Chaser + Stoic

This result reflects a primary Chaser pattern, with Stoic tendencies as a secondary survival response. You lead with emotional openness and relational pursuit — but when your feelings aren’t met or things get overwhelming, you pull back into logic and restraint to protect yourself.

At your core, you’re driven by the Chaser: someone who wants connection to feel mutual, clear, and emotionally safe. You’re likely the one who reaches out first, brings up the hard conversations, and tracks shifts in energy with care. When something feels off, your nervous system amps up — not to create drama, but to restore closeness. Your body interprets silence or distance as danger.

But when that need for connection is ignored, misunderstood, or dismissed, the Stoic part of you takes over. You shut it down. You rationalize your feelings, try to make them smaller, or tell yourself you’re overreacting. Rather than stay in a vulnerable place, you retreat to logic, attempting to stay composed even when you’re hurting underneath. You might even convince yourself you’re fine — until the feelings rise again.

This dynamic can leave you in a push-pull with yourself: reaching out, then retreating; expressing a need, then minimizing it. You might feel like you're always trying to strike the balance between being emotionally honest and emotionally "appropriate." When the Chaser and the Stoic are both active, it’s easy to gaslight your own experience — wondering if your needs were too much or if your silence is now the problem.

Your primary wound stems from feeling like emotional expression made you unsafe, unlovable, or “too much.” So you learned two key moves: reach for love and reassurance — then emotionally self-manage when it’s not reciprocated.

✨ The good news? This isn’t who you are — it’s how you survived. These patterns protected you, but they don’t have to lead your relationships anymore. You can learn to honor your emotions without minimizing them. You can stay with your truth without needing to silence or defend it.

This quiz result is your first step in understanding the Chaser + Stoic dynamic.

Begin with the Chaser ebook, a rich 60+ page guide to help you regulate urgency, release self-blame, and communicate from grounded clarity.

When you're ready, the Stoic ebook will support you in softening emotional rigidity, reconnecting with your feelings, and expressing them without fear of losing your center.